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MIDWESTERN MEASURES:
Short Poems About Minnesota
and the People Who Live There
(Written in Poulter's Measure,
A popular Elizabethan Form).

1. Upon Landing in Flyover Country

We flew above the clouds.
We could not see the ground.
We saw some hills as we went up,
but none when we came down.

2. Doesn't Taste Like Chicken

The sky is bright and blue,
the air is cool and brisk,
but I am flushed and turning green:
I ate the lutefisk.

3. All This and IKEA Too

Progressive to the end,
this state will meet your needs,
and do it with efficiency,
(God Bless the noble Swedes!)

4. Land of a Lot of Lakes

Ten thousand lakes we saw,
and all of them were nice.
Although I think I'd like them more
if they weren't solid ice.

5. Friendly Neighbors

In Minneapolis,
we've really got it all.
And if we don't, then right next door,
they'll have it in St. Paul.

6. The Secret of Longevity

We're healthy folks 'round here,
a fact the world affirms.
We eat well, work hard, and live in
a place too cold for germs.

7. Salt and Pepper to Taste

The diet here is great,
our plates are quite the sight:
with fish and cheese and milk and bread,
our food is always white.

 

8. After the Bear

We saw the Northern Lights,
we saw our clouded breath,
we saw our ripped up tent and then
we slowly froze to death.

 

9. Football Is An Outside Sport

The Vikings used to play
outside in Bloomington,
but now they play inside a dome.
It's warm, but not as fun.

 

10. Where Their Weather Goes

The wind blows from the west
and crosses the Great Lakes,
which makes the snow in Buffalo
come down in sheets, not flakes.

 



Copyright 2004-2007: J. Eric Smith.

Be Gone, But Not So Far